Sarah’s Story
My Christian journey began, I suppose as it does for many, with my Christening as a baby. Just before I started primary school we moved to a small village in Cornwall and my mum decided to start taking me and my brothers to church every week. My mum would enjoy the service and an hour of peace while we went off to Sunday School.
When I outgrew Sunday School I started going to something called Pathfinders which was for the older children. A group of us from Pathfinders got confirmed and although I must have made the decision to do that, I don’t remember what it really meant to me. I definitely believed in it all and I didn’t question my faith.
At some point in my early teens I decided that going to church every Sunday morning was getting in the way of my social life so I asked my mum if I could stop going. She said it was my choice and I decided that my friends were more important to me at that time.
I still went to church on special occasions and I continued to consider myself a Christian. But even after years of Sunday schooling I didn’t really get what that meant. I knew about Jesus Christ, I knew he was God’s son and someone we should all aspire to be like and I knew lots of stories about the amazing things he’d done. What I didn’t understand was why I had to go and sit in a cold church for an hour every week instead of going to see my friends. I felt that He would want me to enjoy my life and that was how I justified it to myself.
A couple of years ago I moved to Menheniot with my husband. Before that we had been living all over the place and life had taken over, I hadn’t really thought much about church – although I still said the occasional prayer and considered myself a Christian.
One day, shortly after moving here, I was off work and I decided to go for a walk around the village. For some reason my feet just took me directly into this church. It was midweek and the church was empty. I sat down in one of the pews at the back and started to pray. To my surprise tears ran down my face and it dawned on me how completely lost I had become.
What happened next changed everything. I very clearly heard God talking to me. It wasn’t a big booming voice from the sky, actually it just sounded like my own voice in my head, but I knew it was God because he was talking in a way that I never, ever talk to myself. He was telling me so calmly and clearly that everything was going to be OK. He told me that I didn’t need to worry or feel sad because everything was in his hands and that I just needed to keep praying.
The relief I felt was so profound and the change in me after that experience is something that cannot be explained except by admitting that in that moment I had returned to God and he had welcomed me back with open arms.
I have a group of good friends who are practicing Christians and I started meeting up with them on a regular basis to discuss it all and ask questions. They were amazing and bought me a bible which I started to read with fresh eyes. The very next Sunday I decided to come to a church service here for the first time. I didn’t even know what time the service started but I heard the bells from my house, grabbed my coat and headed over.
I would usually have found it very daunting, walking into a church service on my own, not knowing anybody inside. It was very out of character for me. But my recent experience had been so strong I didn’t question it for a second. I loved the service and felt so welcome. I looked forward to coming again and again, not because I felt I should but because I genuinely wanted to. I was thirsty to learn more.
The months that followed were very exhilarating and at times full-on. Some extraordinary things happened and I genuinely felt like a completely different person, looking at the world through new eyes. It felt just like the start of a new relationship and it was quite intense for a while, preoccupying me by day and night. Eventually I settled into it and calmed down a bit!
Reflecting on that time now, a few years later, I feel very lucky that it happened. It’s far too easy for doubt to creep in and life to take over but I always hold on to that experience. I still have many questions but what I do have is a personal relationship with God and I know the rest will take a lifetime, and more, to get to grips with.